As The World Turns

Okay, so Bachelor #3 called. And of course, that made me happy. Because I am a simpering, idiotic female! Why do we do this? I know I've asked this before...but still, WHY?

I'm beginning to think that it's not because we need them. Not in a financial sense...but we NEED them in an emotional sense. It is the promise. The promise of having someone to be with you at the end of day when everything seems to have gone wrong and you don't need a solution because you are smart enough to figure one out of your own. You need strong arms. Someone to kiss you and tell you that you they love you and think they you are special. Someone to melt your stress away and rub your back and make it all seem better if only for a couple of minutes. Is that really so much to ask for?

So, as I guessed. Bachelor #2 is gone. And that is okay. I'm not crying any tears over that one....I mean he obviously has listening issues because not 30 seconds after I told him that I didn't like going to a particular kind of restaurant he said that he wanted to go there. Duh!

Bachelor #1 is still in the picture but we are at a crossroads. His view on relationships and mine are vastly different. We have both been hurt and are trying to protect ourselves. He views traditional women as money-grubbing and I view "modern" men as somewhat disrespectful. I can't see this going very far. My glass is half full and his is half empty. I think we could be friends....

Bachelor #3 is still the winner...at least when it comes to family and ideals. When it comes to game playing he is also the winner because he has me wrapped around his finger. Although with the way I'm feeling today, he might get his head chopped off. I'm getting the distinct impression that he likes to initiate contact because when I do, he doesn't respond. He apologized for not seeing me over the weekend and said that the new schedule was throwing him for a loop. He implied that we would see each other this week...I'm crossing my fingers, but not holding my breath.

And finally, in a moment of desperation...I saw the EX. It was actually very cathartic. I'm not sure if he got the same sense that I did. But who cares? He had me under his spell for four years and I am joyous to know that I am finally free. I don't have to worry about seeing him and getting roped back in. I left with a huge smile on my face and the satisfaction of knowing that I can move on with no problems.

I'm not sure if I should welcome you to my soap opera or just my life.